Problems of a Drunk Fashion Student

Whats inside a student's freezer? 

Students praise the freezer, it is the best thing since the wheel or tinder. Most foods left in cupboards and fridges are just a ticking time bomb before it goes a delightful colour of blue. 

It might be down to our overwhelming shopping experiences when left in Morrisons or Tesco's alone. In our hungry state we buy all food we can carry home; only to be left in our cupboard or fridge. 

You would imagine a student would easily eat everything or anything, but in my experience during my panic buys I never buy anything that goes together as a meal. I've also had the re-occurring incident of my chicken defrosting on the tube, for those who haven't travelled on the tube it's like a menopausal women. Sat by a vent or at the far end of a carriage and a cold breeze sweeps over your face (and probably your hair into the next passengers face) however on most days it will give anyone a hot flush and you'll be sat their sweating.

So it is coming to the end of the academic year and what do I have left in my freezer? Plus also what do my flatmates have in their freezers? 

Half Eaten Tub of Ice Cream, 
Believe it or not this is not my half eaten ice cream. About a month ago it mysteriously got left in my freezer draw and no has claimed it yet.

Mouldy Sausages, 

Put in the freezer when I went home for a weekend and then got lost under the bag of broccoli until today. I still can't work out how I manage to let food go off even when frozen. 

Rice. 

There is only one possible question, why did I put rice in the freezer?

Waitrose Yorkshire Puddings, 

The rare occasion I feel wealthy and sophisticated I allow myself to shop here. They were brought alongside a decision to attempt a roast, only to find out roasts are impossible in a student kitchen. I thought buying eggs and milk would be a bad idea as it would only go off. Equally as worse Yorkshire's are the one thing that only go with two possible dishes, 1 toad in the hole and 2 a roast. The first of which I would only make from scratch as sausages next to a frozen pud is not the most appetising. 

Pizza Hut Ice Cream, 

Left here by my friend that came to visit the first week I moved in. I've never got round the concept of pizza hut serving ice cream.

A distorted Ice Pack. 

You never know when you might need one, however it loses its purpose when you freeze it while curled up in a ball. Someone could turn this into an art project one day, manneristic ice packs. (Mannerism was a period in art where figures were distorted and had elongated limbs for those non-art lovers)

Tesco Value Broccoli, 

Thought it was the best idea buying frozen veg in bulk. However I shortly discovered it tastes like shit.

Peas, 

My trusty peas I brought today. Peas will go with any meat/potato/rice combination, perfect for getting that nonexistent 5-a-day. My mum once put them in pasta "If the Chinese can put them in rice, then we can put them in Pasta" Just one of the infamous quotes from my mother.

Flatmate No.1: On the left, a weird egg-like food with a peanut filling? What?

Flatmate No.2: A lot of dumplings. 

Flatmate No.3: I can't really describe this. 

I thought it was time I would reply to a question most of you have been asking; unlike my reply to the standard text message where my track record is about 5 hours. 

What Have You Brought in a Charity Shop?... I never find anything.

So here you go, a simple photo diary of most of my charity shop buys. Enjoy!

To answer your question of 'not finding anything', unlucky. I am sorry for the stress caused by the smell of old (and possibly deceased) people, please scroll down for some tips that might help you.

(Not quite Charity Shop but this was a wonderful handy down; same concept just missing out the charity part) (Disclaimer, always keep the charity part. Charities are good) 

As you know I am obsessed with charity shops and I regularly go in them 2 or 3 times a week, this really is my secret to success. When 'Grandma Hoare' goes on a charity tour, it's go hard or go home. A little lesson I've learnt from having mostly guys as best friends (although sometimes this doesn't end well, but I will blog about that later).

Right so here's my advice:

1. Best Charity Shops for buys: 

British Heart Foundation

Cancer Research

1. Worst Charity Shops for buys:

Oxfam (They're a bit too picky with what they sell, and usually overpriced)

1. I usually know what I am looking for, this helps a lot.

1. When scanning rails I look for interesting patterns and fabrics, not the actual clothes.

1. Look in the opposite sex's section too.

Hope this helps!

P.S. I have also found out my Macbook apparently can't count past one, maybe I should revert back to Windows.

Problems of a Drunken Fashion Student:

How Practical is a Bum Bag on a Night Out?

(Or Fanny Pack)

It is inevitable that within the lifestyle of a fresher there is going to be a few drunken antics that end in tragedy. As for me, my fresher’s tragedy happened only a few months ago when I woke up in the morning with no iPhone or Purse.

My faithful companion of my Primark clutch bag had failed me and was most likely somewhere in the depths of a London alleyway. So what other solutions are there for successfully coming home with both iPhone and Purse?

I would suggest the trusty bra, the ultimate storage rack, however unless you are Christina Hendricks or Kelly Brook this fails horribly. No one really wants to see an awkwardly placed rectangular third boob.

So I come to my real question…

Is the practical use of a Bum Bag much greater than the feeling of being judged?

Yes.

When in the depths of a dark and grimy nightclub wanting to throw some shapes there is no greater awkwardness than hitting the guy next to you with an oversized clutch bag (fortunately this hasn’t happened to me yet).

Having your hands free is also essential when eating an obscure kebab at the end of the night.

I would like to thank my friend Sarah (The Ugly Gosling) for successfully wearing a bum bag on a drunken night out. She proves that a bum bag, can in fact, look good.

I would also like to point out the other practical means of a bum bag, for example in the rare case an elephant is robbing your sun hat.